“Why do people say ‘grow some balls’? Balls are weak and sensitive! If you really wanna get tough, grow a vagina! Those things take a pounding!”
— Betty White, actress, ‘Golden Girl’ and comedian —
Before you allow some derogatory dribble to drain from your brain and out your mouth — Aimee ain’t performing no magic trick with those bananas! — ask yourself this: do I have an understanding of anatomy, biomechanics and/or neurophysiology of the pelvic diaphragm to make any sort of intelligent statement? You may have a vagina, that doesn’t mean you know how it works, or how its supposed to function; you have a liver… do you know how it works and all of its functions? I would guess not. Instead I suggest opening your mind to the reality that you may be unaware of the potential core strength – deep core strength – that is possible, and what deep core strength yields. The strength to move quickly and powerfully and the strength to stand strong both come from the core. Health rises up from our deepest core as does beauty. No core means no strength, no health, and no beauty (real strength, health & beauty that is… not the cheap cosmetic crap available at the mall or from medical professions selling ‘cosmetic’ health & beauty).
Its absolutely unacceptable to be incontinent if you are without spinal cord injury (at or above T12) and/or are without other neurological pathology (e.g. Alzheimers, Parkinsons). The fact that advertising portrays incontinence resulting from a sneeze, snort or giggle as “normal” is crap; incontinence is evidence of nothing else than the fact that you have let yourself go, like really let your core strength go. Imagine if your teenage self met you today and saw how far you let yourself go… ‘teenage you’ would probably beat the crap out of ‘today you’ frustrated at the complacency you’ve allowed yourself to sink into.
How can I say incontinence is unacceptable? Because as a registered physiotherapist I worked in long term care facilities for almost 15 years, and incontinence was an unacceptable result for any resident who didn’t have one of the mentioned pathologies (why? because its a precursor to bed sores). Furthermore, I worked with the registered nursing staff of long term care facilities to develop restorative care programs that the nursing aides would perform in order to assist residents regain continence. Yeah, you heard me right, residents in long term care facilities regaining control over their bodily functions! So, the only excuse to having a lack of control over your own bodily functions is a victim mindset.
Its time that we call out the crap that passes as health advice and the advertising of what is and isn’t healthy. There is absolutely no reason for any adult without neural pathology to be incontinent. If you are, then the issue is core strength, and the reality being… you’ve got none. I don’t care if you do triathlons, run marathons, lead yoga or spin classes… if you dribble, leak or piss yourself regularly, you ain’t got a core. But don’t worry, we can help.
Intimacy & Intercourse
No we ain’t holding back on any topic! But before we can hit these, we have to address the two key impediments to intimacy & intercourse. The first one is being overweight, obese… being fat. Intimacy and amazing intercourse are impossible when an individual has insulated themselves away from the world, away from others with layer upon layer of fat. Congrats, because you’ve let yourself go, because you’ve let your core strength dwindle, because you’ve hollowed yourself out, to compensate for living in this world you’ve had to build outer walls to protect yourself against hurts, fears and ‘failures’. But by building and locking yourself away in your ‘forever’ cave or castle, you’ve simultaneously locked out not only the world, you have also locked out love. Why? Without a core, literally and metaphorically you do not have the strength to stand strong as you, and when you cannot stand strong in your uniqueness, you cannot love yourself as you are, making it impossible for anyone else to love you too.
The second impediment is the typical pattern of frail frigid inflexibility of those who do not stress eat [and become overweight] but become fragile instead and are as warm, loving and capable of intimacy as cold steel on a blustery winters day. Instead of the strength of a core to stand strongly, inflexibility and stiffness are used to protect against the threats of the world.
Either way, there is no point in tackling intimacy and intercourse until there is a core that sheds the layers of insulation or replaces fragility with real strength.
A flaccid pelvic diaphragm doesn’t just yield incontinence, it also yields uncomfortable even painful sexual intercourse and not just for women. Its just as awful to be a man with a flaccid pelvic diaphragm because it provides no solid ground for your general to stand upon firmly. Intercourse shouldn’t be any different than an Olympic athlete competing in trampoline; but if either trampoline or athlete are weak, or worse, give out due to some sort of failure, its a disaster.
Want fabulous fun sex? Then you need a core strong enough to allow you to be you, a core strong enough to have fun as you with those who love you as you. Don’t have such a core, don’t worry, we can help.
Posture and Peak Performance
At some point we need to bring this back to sport, and posture is the pivotal aspect of peak performance that is rooted in a strong set of diaphragms (no, there isn’t just one diaphragm, there are in fact three… and if you don’t know what they are and you claim to be a trainer or coach who knows how to develop a person’s core… well, you are lying to yourself and conning the people coming to you for help).
If you are an arrogant, ignorant, egotistical trainer or coach who claims to develop athletes to their potential, to peak performances yet don’t know that the diaphragms are integral to the core, that without the diaphragms the core is useless, and proceed to train/coach athletes without developing their core properly… please quit training & coaching because (a) you are hurting the athletes who are trusting you as sufficiently educated and experienced to follow through on what you claim to be able to do, and (b) you are wasting the time and athletic careers of the athletes who are trusting you with dead end ‘solutions’.
Without a strong pelvic diaphragm there is no possible way that an athlete can have proper posture from which to execute sport specific technique with any degree of excellence. Further, without strong diaphragms – thats right, all three of them – there is no way that an athlete can maintain proper respiration, hence proper oxygenation of their body during the stress of training, let alone racing.
If you are a hi performance athlete and are continually failing to hit your potential, then you and your trainer/coach have probably missed the pivotal aspect of peak performance: deep core strength including full conscious control of your diaphragms. Inconsistency in performance and an inability to rise beyond a plateau of performance should be expected without a strong deep core. Without one, you will not achieve your potential. But don’t worry, we can help.
Enough is Enough
Its time to call out the fitness industry, the false advertising of what is and isn’t health, and all trainers and coaches who have taken a free ride trying to train and coach and are getting away with it while having none of the knowledge or skill to do anything close while claiming otherwise. Reality is that the fitness industry is simply after your money, the advertising industry manipulates you into thinking incontinence underwear is normal, and the majority of trainers & coaches are absolutely clueless as to what is real health.
Want results? Want real health that leads to real healthy performance results in sport and in life outside of sport? Then you have to work with those who have the education, the experience, the knowledge, the skill, and the problem solving abilities to provide you with an individualized training plan to take you from where you are, to where you want to go. Only question is… how badly do you want to really live to your fullest, experiencing not only your fullest health, but your fullest potential as a result of being healthy?
If incontinence, painful intercourse and the status quo is good enough for you, especially with the “low hanging fruit” solutions of adult diapers and pills to try and make things better, we have nothing to offer you.
If on the other hand, you’ve had enough of “low hanging fruit” solutions and are ready to get to work on exploring and discovering your true potential, then we are ready to help you go all the way.
The W Dryland program is available only to TOETT athletes who are training in our basic dryland program and can achieve the OHP (overhead press position) with ease. W Dryland is delivered one on one by Coach Aimee. Looking to get strong ladies? Here is your chance to pursue your true feminine peak performance potential in sport, and in life outside sport. Fee is $500 and includes all training tools and training guidance for 3 months. Continued coaching from Aimee is available for $300 for additional 3 month blocks.
How did we get here (lacking basic functional core strength)? Because we all made the assumption that the strength, the agility, the balance, and the coordination of our youth was “natural” and would last us a lifetime. We forgot that we spent our youth being active outdoors, playing games and sports, staying out until the lights came on which was the sign that we have to call it a night and wait til morning to pick up where we had just left off. We forgot that all this wonderful activity built us into the strong young men and women capable of setting out independently in life. Then we got busy with life, and we forgot that the core strength we developed doesn’t last for forever (without ongoing work on our core).
The beautiful part is that its reversible! But it takes consistent work, and it takes time, but its doable and most importantly, its worth it. You just have to want to drop the pretense that you are healthy and awesome, and accept the fact that you let yourself go, way too far, and its time to truly invest in your health.
We – Aimee & MJ, the TOETT coaches – have the experience, the education, and we have the healthy results to prove that we know what we are doing and we want to help you no matter what’s your starting point. All it takes is a desire to get going.